Americans are more against each other than for one another. The division in our nation is great; unprecedented. I don’t have a clue how to fix it? Maybe your like me, tired, frightened and worried for your family only trying to survive another day. A recent article talked about America heading toward succession because of the differences we are battling. A divided America…. That can Never Happen! A divided America cannot stand.
What do Americans have in common? All Americans in some form pursue the American dream, choices belong to individuals, not government, in the pursuit of happiness, freedom. A majority want a government that is for all people that can be trusted. A voting system that is ethical. Good medical care. Systems in place that protect all people from “Big Pharm” and researchers that want cures and search for them. Affordable Housing. Our children are our legacy and our greatest treasure, we need better education, childcare that is affordable to all and to allow our children to pursue their dreams in life without fear. Racism has many categories and our nation needs racial healing. Discrimination is ongoing and our systems need a revamp, holding workplaces accountable, without retaliation, fearmongering, or loss of employment. With all we know, how do we go forward and make America better? Maybe it starts with being free thinkers, instead of being spoon fed information and beginning conversations that bring about change or asking questions like ” How do you know what you know? What are your sources? Is there a monetary kickback for your work?. The conversations will be hard, yet the possibility of reconciliation could bring back unification of America.
Heavenly Father, we need you! Our fight isn’t against people on earth but against the rulers and the authorities and powers of this worlds darkness. Against the spiritual powers of evil in the heavenly world. Lord, today we put on the full armor of God.On the day of evil we, your creation can stand strong, knowing you fight for us and when we are weak, God you are a strong house, a tower who covers us and protects us with your wings. Lord we submit to you, resisting the devil so he will flee from our land. Thank you for disarming the devil and making a public spectacle of the forces of evil triumphing over them by the work of the cross. Lord bind up all strategies of old of the enemy. Lord may you rebuke this Great Spiritual Deception, cancelling its abilities to deceive! Lord, thank you in advance for canceling, voiding and nullifying all plans against humanity.Thank you for loving us and fighting for us all! Lord thank you for releasing from heaven a spiritual, physical , mental and emotional healing for every man, woman and child from crown of our heads to souls of our feet with rivers of living water running through us, cleansing us from spiritual battles and man made battles, surrounding our nation with the pure white light of Christ’s Love, enveloping this nation from sea to shinning sea. Thank you Lord that we are loved more than we can ever imagine by a God who died for our sins so that we may live and have eternal life! Healing starts with remembering we are all connected and part of a wonderful plan, God has plans to prosper and not harm to give us all HOPE! The division needs to stop, when Jesus died on the cross, he died for ALL!You All are my Brothers and Sisters, we are All Americans! Our country was built on God, we may be broken , yet we are not defeated! May God’s weepers and warriors arise and pray!
In Jesus Name! Amen!
To answer my own question, “What do Americans have in common? The answer is simple! LOVE. God our creator loves us all!
I have been writing this post with many revisions since August while watching increasingly negative issues escalate in the US and over the globe. Personally, my anxiety is at an all time high, feeling like I’m taking massive zaps of negative jolts of bad energy every time I turn on the news or social media. The massive media blasts of negativity are enough to overwhelm the youngest to oldest of humans. Americans are portrayed as complete idiots to the world, while fighting over politics, racism, Covid-19, vaccines & safety, anti-vaxers vs. vaccinated vs. not vaccinated.
Fellow Americans we are not enemies, we are blessed to live in a great and thriving country, made up of unique and wonderful diversities, a safe haven for those seeking freedom from authoritative tyranny. Our great country was founded on the idea that all Americans of every race are created equal, with each and everyone of us having fundamental rights to liberty, justice, pursuit of happiness, free speech, freedom of religion, due process of law, right to assemble.
Sadly, there’s an internal war in our midst; set up by an enemy of old, to separate, divide and destroy. The battlefield is in our minds. Maybe it is time for us to use our minds and be free thinkers once more. What is the truth? Where are the reports coming from? Can the reporters validate their source? Who is doing the investigations? Do the facts stand the test of Truth?
What is the Truth? How do you discover the truth in what appears to be an ocean of lies, rumors, myths, controversies, fearmongering, brainwashing. Start asking : How do you know what you know? Who is the source of information you obtained this information from? Americans we have the right to ask questions when we are being force feed ideas that don’t meet common sense guidelines, set off red flag alerts, or facts being presented don’t match up and good ole gut instinct! Our questions should be to the point:
Is the source reputable?
Is it safe to try? Based on what facts? How can we be assured it wont harm our health?
Is there a monetary gain tied to the original source? (When money is involved, there is an increased chance of falsehood pertaining to facts!)
Because technology is advanced, its hard to trust photos, videos or even interviews, as reports will take comments out of context.
Do our current News Stations, Reporters, Newspapers still follow the SPJ Code of Ethics below?Read below, form your own opinion?
SPJ Code of Ethic – Preamble
Members of the Society of Professional Journalists believe that public enlightenment is the forerunner of justice and the foundation of democracy. Ethical journalism strives to ensure the free exchange of information that is accurate, fair and thorough. An ethical journalist acts with integrity.
The Society declares these four principles as the foundation of ethical journalism and encourages their use in its practice by all people in all media.
Seek Truth and Report It
Ethical journalism should be accurate and fair. Journalists should be honest and courageous in gathering, reporting and interpreting information.
The SPJ Code of Ethics is a statement of abiding principles supported by additional explanations and position papers that address changing journalistic practices. It is not a set of rules, rather a guide that encourages all who engage in journalism to take responsibility for the information they provide, regardless of medium. The code should be read as a whole; individual principles should not be taken out of context. It is not, nor can it be under the First Amendment, legally enforceable.
Sigma Delta Chi’s first Code of Ethics was borrowed from the American Society of Newspaper Editors in 1926. In 1973, Sigma Delta Chi wrote its own code, which was revised in 1984, 1987, 1996 and 2014.
Do you understand America is at war, within ourselves? Our enemy is trying to divide us in our uniqueness and diversities! This Wonderful Country was planted and founded on GOD! The core of this country is God! Men and women die daily to protect our great country, America! Remember, God is strong when we are weak. America needs God!
Evil is spreading, covering the land, like an early morning fog. The darkness spreads by mouth, slandering, gossiping, discrediting, lowering standards, and tearing apart integrity and character, canceling reputations , destroying the American reputation along with its people causing mass division and distrust.
Americans are the target, with no regard to the color of skin, red, yellow, black, or white! The enemy doesn’t care about your skin color!
Americans, you have the right to question our government, police, medical and each other. Americans ask for Truth! How do you know what you know?
Let us take a break from the news, sit somewhere quietly, allow your mind to clear and simply pray. Pray like never before, pray about our enemies as if they were your most beloved family members.Pray for discernment.
People, we can’t win this battle on our own. we are nothing alone, yet stronger unified! Open your heart. Talk to God! I believe America’s prayers will reach heaven.
May I Ask?
America what have we done??
Why are Americans Angry?
Why has your countenance fallen?
Where is your brother? Your sister?
What have Americans done?
Our hearts should resound with God’s question, “What have you done?” When we recognize our sin for what it is, we will grieve over it. We will experience a deep sorrow and a desire to change and do what is right. We must allow ourselves to go through this grieving process and then move on with thankfulness for God’s forgiveness.
I have heard it said that negative actions stem from one or more of the three basic emotions: guilt, fear and anger. We’ve already seen guilt and fear from Adam and now we see anger with Adam’s son, Cain. Anger is often the firstborn child of guilt and fear.
These three basic negative emotions (guilt, fear, and anger) have continued through the centuries, and we see them at work today. The amazing thing is that God has given us insight into how to deal with them, so that we can escape their destructive influence. Whenever we are faced with one of these emotions, we should allow God to work in our hearts as we respond honestly and specifically to His questions. The answers to our struggles have been here for us right from the beginning. Our answers are found in God’s questions.
Do not retaliate in your anger put your focus on God, what would God do?
While it is inevitable that we will become distracted in life, it is most important that we remember to stay focused on God and His ways. We learn to do this by studying His Word and praying for His guidance. We then put it into action by following His Word and, whenever possible, steering clear of the areas and ways that lead us to distraction. It’s not always easy, but we can have God’s help.
Ignore the distractions of division, focus on God, Pray! May God Heal our Land!
May God give us wisdom and discernment to get the truth to the answers of the question “How do you know what you know?
Below is a Beautiful song called “Heal Our Land”by: Kari Jobe! May your mind clear and worship!
PRAY ABOUT EVERYTHING! NEVER GIVE UP! KEEP MOVING FORWARD!
I recently began to realize that I was not living my life and somewhere along the way, I had lost myself, along with my dreams and hopes flowing through the motions of day to day living.
A person can come to this place after suffering many trails and heartache, I lived that pain every day calling it the walking wounded. You are basically in shock lacking emotions.
When my marriage abruptly ended and I closed up my heart I put my trust in the Lord. I went through my separation and even though I know am free to marry biblically, it did not lessen my suffering.
Then came another storm, my existing relationships of the ones I loved, family and friends began to fall apart. Indescribable heartache, what in the world was I doing wrong. I examined myself and I prayed and fasted. I got no answers.
Then came another storm, I lost my career, my home, my belongings, and eventually my home church, which was the glue holding me together. I felt my heart wither away, I had thoughts of shaving my head and ripping my cloths. My heartache enclosed around me, I felt abandoned and very much alone. Depression slowly laid over me, weighing me down, I was grieving, I never want to feel depression like that again.
Through out my adult life, no one has ever taken care of me, even when I was married, I was alone and if I was sick, I was on my own.
In recent years, due to the recession, loss of income, I was suddenly dependent on others to help me. I was ashamed and humbled as I bounced from one relative to the next, not always being welcomed.
I tried to get back on my feet, becoming discouraged at the lack of employment, struggling just to have gas for an interview, not knowing if I would make it back home. Struggling to get medical and dental care, and pay for my prescriptions. Struggling and desperate to make it to church.
Church was my life line, if I could just get to church, I knew I would make it. Then came the days when I could not get there……. You get so tired of asking for help, then you have the ones who condemn you and think you have committed some horrible sin. That was the knife in the wound.
I saw that I was a woman in a mid-life spiritual crisis who needed to find her heart and protect it. The truth is I have been through terrible battles that left me scarred, mad and afraid. These battles I have lived through broke me into tiny pieces. I share my scars with you, because they are the ashes of my beauty of who I am becoming in Jesus and he knows exactly who I am in him.
I never turned my back on God, I sought him with every ounce of my fiber, at times barely able to whisper his name. I held onto his promises for they are truth and I kept my eyes on him. I took it all to his feet, all my sins, my problems, my heartache and I gave every single broken piece to him, and then I just let go.
Jesus is the sweetest name I know, my best friend, who broke me on the potter’s wheel, then began to mold and shape me into a vessel of his usefulness and then he carefully put me back together.
The wheel is the Holy Spirit in our lives which helps us to build and maintain our relationship with the Father. He brings needed repairs to us, he is our helper and our comforter and the more we depend on him, the better vessel we become in the hands of the potter. I can do nothing without the Holy Spirit in me. I need him every single day.
The Lord then scoops up the moistened clay with His mighty hand and places you on the Potter’s wheel. You hear His promise: “I have measured you; …So today, give all your pieces to Jesus, for who else but the potter can put you back together.
My secret payer had been for God to restore joy. Then my Pastor, announced during a sermon, God was going to answer our secret prayers, no one else knew, except God. That Sunday as I drove home, the Lord gave me the following words…”Lay me down in that cool crisp water, Lay me down and Baptize me in that Holy Ghost filled water.” God was reminding me of the joy of my own baptism.
Then a sensation started in my belly and rose out of my mouth and it was pure sweet laughter, laughter so sweet and joyful, I knew it had come from God, I had not laughed with joy in so long, God blessed me profoundly I was laughing with God!!! God had given me a new song, and a laugh of victory!I was a child of God!
Psalms 2:4 He who sits in Heaven shall laugh, the Lord shall have them (Enemy) in dirision (Mockery or ridicule)!!! Thank you, Jesus!!!
We have the Victory, in our repentance and Baptism!
When you are baptized, and come out of the water, there is unspeakable joy, burden are gone, sins washed away! I cant even explain how good it feels, to know your sins are gone, as far as east is to west!
Oh how sweet the sensation of the Holy Ghost filled water as it covered me
a sinner in need, hanging by a thread , hopeless for love,
feeling worthless, desperately in need of a saviors touch
Oh how sweet the sensation of the Holy Ghost filled water as it covered me
that cool crisp water, as I lay me down, my sins washed away
Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down
Cleanse my soul, and make me new, finding a path unto you. Lay me down and bury me deep, make my sins go far from you. Lay me down and baptize me in that Holy Ghost filled water. Lay me down and baptize me, in that cool crisp water.
In Jesus name, all things are made new, and your soul shall be saved. Lay me down and baptize me, in that cool crisp water. Lay me down and bury me deep, wash my sins away,
Oh how sweet the sensation of the Holy Ghost filled water as it covered me
Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down and baptize me…..in Jesus name. Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down So I can be free.
Oh how sweet the sensation of the Holy Ghost filled water as it covered me.
Lay me down and baptize me, in that cool crisp water. Lay me down and baptize me, in that Holy Ghost Filled Water. Lay me down and bury me deep, wash my sins away, Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down and baptize me…..in Jesus name. Lay me down Lay me down Lay me down SO I CAN BE FREE!!!!
Oh how sweet the sensation of the Holy Ghost filled water as it covered me!!
The anticipation is there, that perfect hot cup of coffee, how great it would be if our coffee cups, let us know , the coffee is indeed Hot! LOL
As I look inside my cup, the brown color tells me it needs a little creamer. I’m trying “White Chocolate with Macadamia” this week. A little goes a long way, yet it is , so Good!
Then I have to decide will I add sugar too? One lump or two? LOL
Then I am ready, my first sip is divine, coffee lady, who has a sense of humor, I just love the wiggly doggie……………. Coffee is one of my treats , I do for me, A simple act of kindness to myself, yet nothing was more fun than paying for the order behind me, in my favorite coffee drive through, it allowed me to be anonymous, giving, and joyful! A simple Act of Kindness can indeed be a beautiful act of love, so go ahead this fall, figure out a simple inexpensive way to give and watch your joy level rise! Coffee and Kindness! Blessings to All!
Good Morning, How are you today? Not so good? Me neither, trying to rise above! So, I thought maybe we could have a wee bit of coffee and a prayer together! My small coffee pot for one , no matter how I make it always ends up with coffee grinds in it, I’m not complaining , nope, really ecstatic to have coffee! I LOVE “me” some coffee with Starbucks creamer! The other creamer is out of stock “White Chocolate & Raspberry!”
First off, let me say “God Bless you each and everyone!” I hope your day is filled with joy! Today we all have a choice to let our light shine, with all that is before us in these uncertain days! I choose to Shine!
And share a prayer, may it bring us all peace!
Dear God, we humbly come before you praising you and all your creation! There is nothing going on under the sun and moon that you don’t already know about! Lord we ask that the schemes of the enemy be brought out of darkness into the light exposed and destroyed by you! Father we pray you eradicate, cancel and void Covid 19, Cancer, Aids, man made virus, diseases and afflictions! Father, we declare healing to our nation for by your stripes we are healed! We take authority pleading the blood of Jesus, believing for protection over our children, grandchildren, all our families and friends. We ask in Jesus name that you surround us with the pure white light of Christ love, protecting each and everyone spiritually, physically, mentally and emotionally. We pray a strong hedge of protection around our nation believing and having faith God’s protection is there. Standing firm in the faith, that Jesus Christ is with us , knows our need for healing, delivering and providing us from the smallest to the greatest of our details. We bind up the enemy, in all areas, all attacks, all schemes, all devices, cancelling them and declaring them void in the authority and name of Jesus Christ! Thank you Lord that you FIGHT for us and make a way , that we are the head and not the tail, We are above only and not beneath, We are complete in Him Who is the Head of all principality and power, We are alive with Christ , We are free from the law of sin and death, We are far from oppression and fear does not come near us. We are born of God and the evil one does not touch us! We are redeemed from the curse of sin, sickness, and poverty, We are healed by the stripes of Jesus, For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love and a sound mind! We are greatly loved by God! We are submitted to God and the devil must flee from us because we resist him in the Name of Jesus! We are firmly rooted, built up, established in our faith and overflowing with gratitude in Jesus name we pray . Amen!
I dont know about you all! I sure feel better after praying!
Now take that great cup of coffee and look out your window!
Time has passed, and I am not so young. My old love went away, breaking my heart each day, isn’t that enough? Then you take our little girl, treating me like I was dirt. Must you destroy her too? There I stood in that motel room, believing all was lost. In that old drawer were words that leaped up, a gift of a bible. It was as if an eternity had passed, and your words just grabbed me up. You walked every step of my life as it fell apart all those years ago. Pushing me up, swirling colors of emotion playing a love song made just for me! You reached down and brought me up from the depths of despair and encircled me with your love. The melody of the song drawing me ever near to love so profound and dear! I thought I would surely die until you showed me how to fight. Not with weapons, hate, or violence, only with love, could wrong be undone. I knelt before you, and that candlelight glowed! I prayed for the one who tried to destroy my soul! Mercy and Protection Words of forgiveness flowed The light dissolved my pain, turning my scars into beauty, dignity, and respect. Embraced by my heavenly father’s love, the Holy Spirit in motion. Heard my cries down on my knees crying out; father, please! In the wink of an eye, he placed my child back in my loving arms. All things are possible for those who believe, just like when God serenaded a wretch like me? With his love song, long ago.
Heavenly Father, I glorify and lift you, because you are worthy, worthy of praise, you are the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, Healer, Advocate, Almighty, Author, and Perfecter of Our Faith, Deliver, Faithful and True! The Great I Am, the King of Kings, the Light of the World. Humbly, I offer gratitude and thanks for all you have done in my life and all that you will do still. I praise you for you are Holy and I love you, I adore you, the lifter of my soul. Lord, I pray just as you poured your loves song into me that you would pour it out to all who are in need tonight who are going through the storms of life. May you serenade them with the word, which is truth, and encircle them with your overflowing, unconditional love, in Jesus’s name. Amen!
I love being creative or innovative. My hobbies are writing, blogging, interior decorating, staging and art. Recently I got back into Art after watching an acrylic pour video using Acrylic paints. I wondered if I could be successful if I gave painting a try. I loved art when I was younger, drawing and painting. Not sure why, it just faded away. 🤷 Painting is fun because to me there are no mistakes, just keep going till you achieve what you like to create. I don’t have any certain niche, My hobby has helped my anxiety and stress levels considerably. I started by watching YouTube videos then started playing around until I learned basic techniques and in process ruined good cloths.🤪 Now I happily keep paint cloths on hand 👌. Don’t be shy give art a try. The possibilities are endless. After all if we pray about creating to our Lord who is the master creator, having created our universe, isn’t God capable of gifting us at any age? Just a thought! Now pray and Create, it will be fun!💯🌝
Prayer :God, Thank You for being my creative director. Thank You for guiding me and leading me into the divine destiny you have in store for me. It’s easy to think that I know it all, but I don’t. I don’t have all the answers, You do. More often than not, I won’t know the “how” but I know the “who” and that is You. You are the one that will strengthen and qualify me. You are the one that will fill me with ideas and creativity that the world has yet to witness. You are the one that will give me the wisdom to carry out those ideas so that they will be manifested in Your name. Lord, even when it doesn’t make sense to me, give me the confidence to trust that You know what You’re doing. Lord, please do not let fear or anxiety push me to depend on my own understanding. Lord, not only are you my creative director but you are my creative consultant. Help me to consult You before I act and lean on Your direction alone.
Early on from birth, humans are given false labels based on demographics, culture, heritage, ancestry, by society, family, friends and strangers. Labels are what you call yourself in your head, tags planted by you or others in your mind. These labels are attached by society? We take that tag and become what we think we are told by others in society. Sadly what tags we allow to plant in our minds becomes our truth, even though its false.
God Labeled you prior to your birth? He identified you and wrote your name on the palm of his hand. He knows everything about you including your gifts, personality, strengths, weakness.
Do you remember where your negative labels came from, the root origins? Did it start with society? Parents? Friend? or Spouse? Were you given positive affirmation or negative tags that became labels. Did daddy call you beautiful, or something negative, like lard _ss? Did mom say great job Bobby , or did she look at your finger paint drawing , saying “What the H_ll is this, you will never be an artist.”
Positive and negative labels become planted in our minds, most people recall negative over positive labels,because they were hurt, ashamed, humiliated or shocked.
I really loved the movie call “The Help,” as it deals with negative labels acquired at birth. These women from all walks of life found a way to shed their false labels. rising above to encourage one another, making new positive labels to replace the lies of the old labels.
It’s time to let go of false labels! Do you have a pen and paper, I want you to do something for you that is life changing. Stop reading at this moment and go look in the mirror. Who do you see? Write down top negative labels about you that come to mind as you gaze in the mirror. Its time to change these old negative labels for new positive labels.
Jesus gave his life out of unconditional love for you and the sacrifice was worth the cost, that you may have eternity. Jesus died so that you may live. God showed you are priceless,. Never forget that.
Pray with me : Lord I want my true identity to show through you, in who you created me to be on this earth! Lord please forgive me for accepting false labels. I am more than a negative word spitted out to bring me low, I am your creation. You knew me when you formed me in my mothers womb. I am your child. I come to the cross submitting all false negative labels to you! Raise me up to remember who I am called to be, your labels flowing to my mind!
Lord, I know you can heal all my wounds caused by every false label, wrapping me in your redemptive love teaching me new labels in your word, like forgiven. (Eph. 1:7-8), secure. (Romans 8: 31-39), capable. (Phil. 4:13), valuable to God. (1 Cor. 6:20) , chosen and dearly loved. (Col. 3:12), New Creation (2 Corinthians 5:17), His Child (Ephesians 1:5)
Lord I know I am me, and I am uniquely and wonderfully made, beloved, the child of a King, I am who you say I am in Jesus name! Amen
The free-spirited, red-haired girl, just shy of three, was experiencing her first Easter after her paternal grandmother had bought new clothes for the family. Her brother proudly showed off his new black suit and teal blue tie, as she and her older sister twirled around in circles in their new pastel ginger graham dresses. The family was off to church, to make “Grammy Happy!” Little did the children know what church meant or why they had to go! if it were up to the little red-haired girl she would go every time to just get the basket full of candy!
The child’s enthusiasm wore off quickly as the church was scary. She wasn’t allowed to talk and had to sit still, yet the man up front got to talk for a long time and she eventually fell asleep of boredom. Her mother wakened her abruptly, she was sleepy, stumbling through all the people her insides were shaking, afraid she’d lose her momma’s hand. The child hung on for dear life following crowds outside, as there was going to be an “Easter Egg Hunt.”
Everyone was instructed to go find colored eggs, some were real, others had toys or money inside. All those kids took off like mad dogs to find eggs that had been laid in the grass while it was hot as hades. Didn’t folks know eggs go bad quick?
The Grand Finale of the day was when the red haired girl promptly began vomiting all over the grass! Heat, fear, anxiety, and sweets with eggs were a bad combination. The family hastily made a quick exit.
Honestly, I don’t remember learning about Jesus that day. This is my story and how it all began, and how I fell in love with Jesus , my Savior and Lord! Every Sinner has a story and a journey! Mine began at three!
The little red-haired girl is grateful that Jesus was already pursuing her, never giving up, planting seeds of “Love, Hope, and Faith!” It never ceases to amaze the number of people who came into her life to teach the “Love of Christ,” that people are still coming. The best gift anyone could get on Easter is salvation and eternal life with our creator!
The Love of God is Agape, unconditional, and God will pursue you, for our father will leave many to find the one who is lost! Let us pray for you to receive that gift today! God is pursuing you, he will use many people to bring you the message of his LOVE, its time to open your eyes and see, God is here, he loves you and is searching for you! Where ever you are at this moment, close your eyes, lift your hands to heaven, repent (ask forgiveness of your sins) at that instant you are a new person in Christ. Great work has begun in you and your faith through the Holy Spirit! Welcome to God’s Kingdom!
Rabbit Sit Down! Jesus Arose On The Third Day, to Save Us All! Easter is about salvation, not pretty bunnies, eggs, or candy!
“Accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior will not only save you from eternal judgement, but also blesses your health, joy, peace, love, hope, unconditional acceptance, favor, prosperity — every good thing that you can think of and more!”
Today I wanted to take a moment and thank you for supporting my writing, following my blog and inspiring me to write!
I enjoy reading your blogs when time permits, you all are incredible and brave for putting your stories, voices and passion out in the world.
I have been in a quiet mood since December, God blessed me and I won my disability case. First, I blessed those who stood by me during my trying times, my daughter and son in law and a dear friend (smile, you💜 deserve anonymous recognition) without them I wouldn’t have made it!
I bought a good used car, and began the hunt for a place to live. It took several months. and finally I have my own cute place! The stairs are a challenge, due to my health conditions, seriously sometimes I no choice but to crawl up! I am slowly furnishing my home, through thrift stores, it is livable, just not how I want it to be, more cozy and warm. I am a Taurus after all and my home is my sanctuary.
I have never lived alone, ever, in my life. The transition has been hard. Currently, my daughter and my grands are very near, I see them often, and in a few weeks that will change, they are moving. While I am excited about their move, and all the wonderful opportunities coming their way, I feel I am holding a reservoir of emotion back, that is trying to erupt along with finally being able to grieve over the loss of my dad in 2019. Despite my blessings, and I give all glory to God, I feel numb, and I force myself to be motivated.
There is no shame in my game, when I tell you all I am actively search for a good therapist who can help me transition through my grief, help me with relationships, and this sadness I feel when I am alone.
It takes courage to ask for help, and I thank God, there are wonderful Christian counselors out there who can not only help me, and if you are courageous as a mouse or a lion, just maybe help those of you who are struggling.
Self Care and Mental Health should always go hand in hand with all medical check ups! Below is a great article I found, I encourage you to read it!
I am grateful and thankful, struggling to get joy back in my life, now please don’t misunderstand, my daughter and grandchildren give me great joy. The joy I am talking about, maybe, is my individual joy, finding me again. I have always been a giver, protector and caretaker for others, yet I fail at those three descriptions personally for myself. I believe I have a co-dependency issue? Will soon find out.
Writing in the past brought me personal joy, whether I was good or bad at writing is irrelevant.( I can still hear my 12th grade English teacher, telling me my writing was a failure to keep my job at a burger joint.)
Today, I pushed forward past my sadness, and I wrote this article to encourage others, lift and motivate with high hopes, it might just do the same for me! I only ask one thing of my readers:
Re-blog of Christmas past story I wrote, may the story encourage, bring forth hope! Our answers are just a prayer away!
The Lord God Almighty stood before his angels, looking intently at the human race. God’s voice roared announcing to his Warrior Angels he had a very important mission for them, that they were to descend upon the earth and find all the prayers of his faithful servants, who praised and worshipped him in the Christmas Season, his earthly birthday.
The angels that will live forever passed the powers as they parted allowing them to go down to earth in a spiraling mass of anticipation, seeking beloved saints, who had stayed the course and remained faithful. When the last and littlest angel passed the powers they turned and closed up the realm of heaven.
“Yonah” which means, “Dove” was the littlest angel of the masses who quickly flew to catch up with his fellow warrior angles, His heart-shaped face, was in deep concentration encased with reddish hair, and deep soulful blue eyes. Yonah was breathtakingly beyond beautiful, a creature blessed by God, for what he lacked in size he had in strength and heart. He paused in his descent, and hovered with the light fluttering of his wings, he looked in all directions and noticed how still and quiet it was, something was not right. With that thought he folded his wings inward and dove, he had to find her, maybe she was still praying, for he knew he could detect the weakest of prayers. Down he went.
Cindy was winding down and watching the six o clock news, her coffee had grown cold, oh, why in the world did she turn that dang TV on, there was never any good news unless you counted the weather report, and all it showed was a forecast of possible snow and ice. Her thoughts drifted to the last few years, she could not remember the last time she had felt joy, she remembered her episodes of sobbing and feeling of hopelessness, after her husband walked out and abandoned her, the rug being pulled out from under her when housing market started to falter and her boss laid her off, then the economy crashed and the bottom fell out, her savings went to help her daughter finish school and to help her with attorney fees in a heated custody battle over her granddaughter, now she was in her second extension of lay off, she had lost her home, had to give away all her belongings, her car engine blew, and she only had five weeks of unemployment left. During all this time she had been sick with a thyroid issue, she gained over fifty pounds, three fourths of her hair fell out, she had a cyst in her breast, severe acid re flux, she went from the person she recognized to looking like a stranger, then came the allergic reactions, inability to breath, then her doctor let her go as a patient, saying she was too difficult to treat, she could no longer focus, or keep her thoughts straight, she kept writing notes to herself so she would not forget what she needed to do or what she had said to someone in conversation, her family relationships became strained, her friends walked away without even looking back. Job-hunting was hopeless; she did not even have a college degree. There were no jobs to compete for, in one year she had, one interview. Sadly she had fallen away from her church family, not by her choice, it just happened slowly like her thyroid disease, at first she felt nothing unusual, then she was hit with a powerful punch, that near bought knocked her off her feet. It wasn’t just one thing but an accumulation of many things, hurtful things, things she did not know how to talk about, how to express, like a vine twisting up her body sucking the life out of her little by little, her family’s lack of understanding and indifference, having to go to the hospital alone, time after time, scarred out of her wits, barely able to breath, excruciating chest pains, inability to sleep, and the pain in her muscles that hurt her to her core daily. She felt betrayed, and buried so far into the pit of despair she did not know how to climb out. No one from her church had ever called her, instead, they just talked about her, called her backslidden, made fun of her weight, and snickered about her, and who she was before she found Christ. Jesus had wiped her sins clean, but her fellow man continued to judge her, and as hard as she tried to be a part of the church family, she was rejected and persecuted time after time. They were so worried about her outward appearance they never stopped to look at her inward appearance and the change God was doing in her life. That was when she began to visit other churches, looking for a family to accept her and love her. She let go of her family church, yet she remained faithful in prayer and her love for God.
The Spirit of Torment keep circling Cindy, giggling in evil ragged laughs, it was working, he just about had her where he wanted her if only he could break her will to pray, then she was his. No Matter how he tormented her, he could not touch her family as she prayed daily the word of God to cover them, it was just a matter of time, she would break, and in arid anticipation he rubbed his long bony fingers together, when all of a sudden he noticed, a gleam of light approaching, and he swiftly hid and was angered to see “Yonah” approaching, one of God’s Warrior Angels. The Spirit of Torment snorted in disgust, warrior indeed, besides Gabriel, he looked like a child, even though he was fully formed. Yonah was actually encouraging good thoughts to Cindy, what was he doing, he was ruining all his hard work, noooooooo, Cindy was getting on the floor, he and Yonah both heard her knees crackle and crunch, as her weight bore down, she bent over and put both hands out to lower herself to the ground, and promptly fell, pushed more like it, flat on her face.
Cindy laid on the floor, sobbing, in disparity, all she can mutter is one word. “Jesus”! Yonah continues to encourage her, and The Spirit of Torment becomes enraged.
Her sobbing turns to wailing and in the midst of her wailing “The Holy Spirit of God” moves in to intercede, and her tongue starts to flow in the heavenly language, she pours out her soul, slamming her fist from time to time “God, please do not forsake us, forgive us, Lord!” As the prayer pours forth from her mouth, Yonah snatches up the words and races toward heaven with her prayer in his hands, with The Spirit of Torment, hot on his trail. The Spirit of Torment pulls out his bow and aims and let’s go with his arrow racing through the air, piercing Yonah, who cries out and begins to fall, and The Spirit of Torment races past him, to help in the battle ahead.
Yonah examines his wound as he hides in the clouds, and decides to head home, the Master is waiting, and he does not want to disappoint the Lord. With grit and determination he heads to the heavenly realm and what he sees, is beyond his wildest perception, there are no Powers guarding the realm of heaven, and fearfully he approaches and looks up over the edge, and before him as far as his eyes can see is a great battle. Blue realms turning gray to black, between the Lords angels and the Angels who deserted God and now sided with the Destroyer. The battle is fierce, sword clashes against sword, shields are drawn, and held high to protect, and in the middle is a dragon called Legion, who is churning out battle orders harshly and has eight voices talking at once. Yonah begins to doubt himself, he is a warrior angel who is scared to go in battle, and in order to reach the Lord he must go through the battlefield, oh, where and how can he get his strength and a plan. Then he remembers Cindy, she is the answer, so he heads back to earth, and the demon is gone, thinking he has won, Cindy is laying on the ground spent exhausted and worn out, she says, God, you promised to never leave us, you promised in your word you would fight for us, and have mercy upon us, Lord, I have faith in your, Lord please defend us, and she continues to sob, God, I am here use me Lord, what can I do , I am nothing , one person, and Yonah smiles and slowly allows
Cindy to feel his pain, torment, and the heat of the battle, with an unexpected fierceness of rage, Cindy slams her fist into the ground and screams “NO MORE”, and the Holy Spirit of God begins to intercede, and Cindy rages into speaking in tongues, battling for what she knows not…….. Cindy prays as if her life depended on it. She pressed forward, and unseen to Cindy, Yonah, began to glow with a bright stars brilliance, and his wings surged with strength, and power filled his limbs and a sword dropped into his hand, and Yonah raced back to the realm of heaven and in the first blow the littlest warrior angel destroyed half of Satan’s army, as Yonah fluttered above the battle field, he dove to strike his next blow and the defected angels and demons fled, and Yonah was face to face, with Legion, and all eight of his voices ragged blasphemies at him , and with one swift blow, with the word of God, his sword, Yonah took off his head and the voices spoke no more, and the powers returned to the realm. Yonah swiftly gathered all the prayers that were dropped during battle and along with Cindy’s prayer ascended to heaven to the Throne and bowed at the Lord’s feet and presented all the prayers of the saints on Christmas Eve. The Lord God Almighty smiled and hugged the littlest angel saying “Job well done”! God then turned as the angels rejoiced and opened up the heavens and poured forth his blessings unto his children. Peace returned to the earth, at the same time it flooded Cindy where she laid, and she began to sing and rejoice in the Lord! Cindy stood and dusted herself off; her sobbing had been replaced with joy and she began to dance before the Lord!
In the year to come God ordered restoration to his faithful saints, with blessings beyond measure! As a child of God Cindy hardly understood all that had transpired, what gained the victory was allowing herself to be used, pressing forward and having faith and trusting the Lord even when she didn’t understand, what was important was she remembered to leave herself open to God’s calling.
At times I am amazed at the love you have for us, thank you for sending your son, so that we might be saved. Thank you for your priceless gift of love. Lord, we ask you to move through our great nation, a nation which was built “In God we trust”, on a solid rock foundation. Lord, our rock has been shaken as we as a nation moved away from thy precepts, forgive us, Lord. Lord, we bow to you in humility, and humbleness, we call on your holy name we pray and ask for your forgiveness and ask that this would be a new era that would heal our land and once more make us into a proud Godly nation united under you, our Lord and Savior. We ask and seek your presence in our government, our homes, our schools, our workplaces, our judicial system, our healthcare, and for the one true God to be present in our churches. Wake us up and stir us up Lord to do your calling and your will, give us insight, wisdom, to be spiritual leaders, and guidance to succeed. As in Joel 2:12- we are coming to you Lord with all our heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with morning, until every hindrance is removed and fellowship is restored. In 2 Chronicles 7:14- If my people who are called by my name, will humble themselves, pray, seek, crave, my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and forgive their sin and heal their land.
My father, let those who are tired come to you, the lost, the brokenhearted, the despondent, and the hopeless. I have heard it said that you love these people and you walk among them and save those who are crushed in spirit. I pray God for our protection, our family and our friends and our church, and these individuals that I lift up to you. I pray Psalms 91 and I plead your blood over them. I pray that you heal them and bind up their wounds. They cannot hear, they cannot see, they cannot speak, and they are blind, deaf and ignorant of your truth. I stand humbly before you God and ask you to open their ears, their minds, and their eyes. Some call them the scum of society, worthless, scavengers, unclean, and not savable. I see them as future saints adorned in crowns of beauty, gladness, and garments of praise. Lord, I know your truth is for every man, woman, and child. I pray for warrior angels commanded by you Lord, to set a hedge of protection around them, to guard them, so that when your vessels of saints come in contact with them and speak your truth and salvation the light in your vessels will not be your saints they see, it will be you, their Redeemer, their Savior, whose words will turn the lost to being found and the despondent to having hope, and the hopeless to be full of joy, all to be planted in faith of our Lord Jesus Christ with assurance of salvation. Save them, God, our doors are open, and we welcome them into your house.
Christmas Prayer My father let those who are sick, come to you, heal their bodies with no lasting effects, woo the lost, the brokenhearted, the despondent, bind up their wounds and release great joy. I have heard it said that you love us all, good and bad, you walk among us and save those who are crushed in spirit. I pray for salvation for all humans , for protection over our families , friends, , and strangers, these individuals that I lift up to you believing you will not forsake us. I pray psalms 91 pleading your blood over them. I stand humbly before you God and ask you to open their ears, their minds, and their eyes. I see them as future saints adorned in crowns of beauty, gladness and garments of praise. Lord I know your truth is for every man, woman, and child. I pray for warrior angels commanded by you Lord, to set a hedge of protection around them, to guard them, so that when your vessels of saints come in contact with them and speak your truth and salvation, the light in your vessels will not be your saints they see, it will be you, their Redeemer, their Savior, JESUS, whose words will turn the lost to being found and the despondent to having hope, and the hopeless to be full of joy, all to be planted in faith of our Lord Jesus Christ with assurance of salvation. Save them God, our doors are open, and we welcome them into your house. In Jesus Name, Amen! 🩸❤️💯
Photographs tell stories, yet most remain silently unobserved within the picture. The picture longs to speak, telling its hidden story. The little girl does not know about the gift of courage placed inside her before she was placed in her mother’s womb, which is rising to combat all that is against her.
I relate to this image because I recognize the darkness floating around the young girl; surrounding her deep thoughts while smiling outwardly. On the inside, the wait can be unbearable, her pain unnoticed, while she smiles outwardly as her stomach rumbles doubt, like waves of the ocean, the knot of fear that holds her back with chains are being pulled and twisted. Her wrists bleed to break free. A knot continues to rise in her throat to try to silence her once more.
At the exact second, she has noticed a light goes off in her, the knot of fear rips out the voice, a roar unleashing words flow from her mouth to her pen, she is silent no more.
Father God, we humbly come before You and we seek Your face, Lord God. Lord we praise You and thank You for all that You have done in our lives and all that You are doing and will do in our lives, in Jesus Name. Thank You, Lord God for Your mercy and grace; thank You for the forgiveness of sins and most of all, thank You, Lord God for Your love that You have lavished up us. Father God, thank You for Your Word and for the Holy Spirit to lead, guide, and direct our foot steps, in Jesus Name.
Lord, you alone are worthy to be praised; we worship You with all our hearts, minds, lives, and our strength. We humble ourselves before You, Lord God; we know that we are unable to do anything apart from You, O God. You know what we need and how to provide for each of us. O God, we lift up holy hands without doubting and we sing out Holy, holy, holy are You Lord God Almighty. You alone are worthy; You alone are in control. We completely and totally surrender our lives, hearts, minds, desires; we give it all to You, O God. We humbly submit ourselves.
Thank You, Lord God, for the many areas that are breaking forth into revival; our hearts and souls cry out, REVIVE US, O LORD!!! Lord God, thank You for restoring broken and dying marriages, healing the sick, restoring the lives that have been shattered, mending the broken hearts.
Lord God, thank You for bringing families back together and wrapping them in Your complete love, in Jesus Name. Thank You, Lord God for the jobs that You are preparing for Your people; the open doors of opportunity to be a witness to those that are bound in darkness. Thank You for the opportunity to speak life, truth and love into the lives of so many that are hurting and bound up in darkness. There is so much to be so thankful for and we praise YOU, Lord God. Thank You for the valleys and for the storms; for if we never had a problem, we would not know what You can do; through it all, we praise You and give You all the glory. We place our faith in you alone!
Lord God, create within us all a pure heart and renew a right spirit within us all, in Jesus Name. Forgive us for giving into the lies and deceptions of the enemy; forgive us for entertaining thoughts that are lies and deceptive. Forgive us for becoming lukewarm and apathetic, in Jesus Name. Forgive us for losing focus on what we need to be about, and for allowing the ways of this world to be distracting. Forgive us for giving into our weakness and for falling into temptation; forgive us for comprising in areas of our lives. Lord God, forgive us for our sins, in Jesus Name. Lord God, you called us to come out from among them, not to join them and be apart of this wickedness. Lord God, release Your holy fire upon us all and burn away all that is not of You, Lord God. Purge and cleanse us all of all this lawlessness, impurities; let us be vessels of holiness and purity, a true reflection of You, Lord God. Let us be conduits and containers that carries Your Holy Fire everywhere; being a constant reflection of You to a world that is dark and cold. You said we are the light of the world and the salt of the earth. It is only through You, O God can we be that true light and salt. It is only when we surrender completely and totally to You, we are transformed to being the light and salt. Let us not move ahead of You, nor lag behind You, let us walk with You in complete obedience to Your Word, Lord God. Let us not look to the right or to the left, let our eyes only be on You. Let us not entertain our minds or thoughts with ideas or thoughts that are contrary to the Word of God. Your word says to think on things that are pure, lovely, and wholesome, of good report. We renounce every thought, every idea that presents itself against the Word of God, right now in Jesus Name. We rebuke the lies and deception of the enemy and command our ears to become deaf to the lies and deception of the enemy, in Jesus Name. Let us pay no attention nor thought to his lies and deception. We renounce the power of sin and command it to leave right now, in Jesus Name. We take authority over every unclean spirit and command it to leave our homes, families, friends, our church, our workplace, communities, neighborhoods, cities, and our NATION, right now in Jesus Name.
We bind up the works of darkness and of wickedness and we command it to go back to the pit of hell right now. You foul spirits, we give you notice right now, you are evicted from our lives, our families, our friends, our homes, our workplace, our neighborhoods, our communities, our cities, our NATION, in Jesus Name. We plead the BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST over the door posts of our hearts, minds, and souls, over our lives, homes, families, friends, church, neighborhood, community, city, and our NATION, in Jesus Name.
Lord God, forgive those that have done us wrong and that have violated our trust, in Jesus Name. Heal the open wounds that have been left behind and heal the disappointments that we have experienced, in Jesus Name.
Release the Fire of God upon us and let us be completely and totally ablaze with Your Holy Fire, in Jesus Name. Let our lives be a constant reflection of Your Fire, in Jesus Name. Let us be ministers of Your Holy Fire; let the flames of revival flow through our lips as we speak Your Word, O God. Protect us with a wall of Fire that quenches and burns up all the traps of the enemy; disarming him from any further onslaughts, in Jesus Name. Let us put on the full armor of God daily before we start our day, in Jesus Name. Help us to use the armor as You have destined us to use it; help us to fight powerful and victoriously and fiercely, in Jesus Name.
Let us rise up and be bold, courageous, and mighty like a lion because if You go before us, than whom shall we fear; if our God be with us, who dare be against us!!! No weapon formed against us shall prosper, and every tongue that rises against us shall be condemned, in Jesus Name. Nothing the enemy throws at us will be effective because we are more than conquerors through Christ; we have already overcome the onslaught of the enemy because the Spirit of the Lord is alive within us, in Jesus Name.
The train of Lord’s robe fills the temple with glory; there is no room for nothing else. O God, put within us all a heart of a warrior, a heart of a champion, a heart of a LION that is fearless and bold, in Jesus Name.
When we have done all that we know to do; O God, help us to STAND, for we know you fight for us and will never forsake us, in Jesus Name. amen amen amen!
Heavenly father, tonight I come to you Lord and give thanks for everything! Lord guide our steps, give safe passage in our comings and goings! Thank you for being our forward and rear Guard! Lord we know you fight for us as it is written; spiritually physically mentally and emotionally ! We as a nation claim it is so! God we believe and have faith Lord, that you are with us and will never forsake us; as it is written ! God may your hand show favor upon our nation and world for 1000 generations giving favor in each our lives! May this great nation rise up from the ashes, unified and solid as the rock, casting our past at Jesus feet, forgiving all and stepping into a future land built upon God and by God ! That our latter would be better than our past, proclaiming blood of Jesus upon us, that truth will prevail. Jesus is our King! Amen!
He is clothed in a robe dipped in blood, and the name by which he is called is The Word of God. . . . On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written, King of kings and Lord of lord.
Psalm 121 asks the question, “where does my help come from?” There is chaos all around on earth! America is being shaken! Money won’t fix all your problems. Moving wont stop Covid-19, protestors, or calamity! New ideas or a political party, or who will be the next president won’t help you at the deepest levels of your life. To wear or not to wear a mask is mute. You simply need God! LOOK UP!
Because these other false gods can’t bring peace to the soul, heal you or deliver this country! You must look above the mess and focus on Jesus!
Read his word, get into a devotion plan, fasten your eyes, heart and soul on Jesus!
Pray, say his name! Jesus! Lord help us!
Where is Jesus? Jesus is right here with us in our midst, waiting to hear you call his name! Call him! You are loved far more than you know by a God who formed you in your mothers womb and knew you before you ever arrived on this planet! You are his creation! LOVED BY A MIGHTY GOD!
The psalmist in the bible then says —
My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
Only God !!!
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? 2 My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
3 He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; 4 indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The Lord watches over you— the Lord is your shade at your right hand; 6 the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
7 The Lord will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life; 8 the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
What DOES THIS SCRIPTURE MEAN?
PSALM 121 PRAYER POINTS
1. Father i thank you for you are my ever present helper in time of need in Jesus name 2. Father, i thank you for You never sleep nor slumber over issues of my life 3. Father, because you are my shield, i shall not be afraid of the enemy in Jesus name 4. I declare that i am heavily protected by the hand of God in Jesus name 5. I declare today that i am protected from every evil attacks of the day in Jesus name 6. I declare that i am protected from every evil attack of the Night in Jesus name 7. Father, i declare that my soul is preserved in you, therefore my enemies cannot afflict me in Jesus name. 8. I release the angels of the Lord to connect me to my destiny helpers in Jesus name 9. I shall never be stranded in life in Jesus name 10. I shall never lack help in life in Jesus name 11. Every evil power, working against my prosperity, you are cancelled. voided, in the name of Jesus. 12. Every evil power, that wants to deny me of my destiny, cancelled and voided, in the name of Jesus. 13. It is written concerning me, that I will divide the spoil of my enemies with the land with the great and mighty and it shall be so, in the name of Jesus. 14. Holy Spirit, You are my chief destiny helper, connect me to my other destiny helpers, in the name of Jesus. 16. Every evil power, that wouldn’t allow me to reach my potential,cancelled and voided, in the name of Jesus. 17). Oh Lord, as you sent angel Michael to help Daniel in time of need, send your angels to send me help in Jesus name. 18). Oh Lord, I have peace of mind, because you are my helper in Jesus name. 19). Father I declare that man will not boast as the source of help in my life, you are my only helper in Jesus name. 20). Oh Lord, help me to live a godly life as I serve you. Thank you Jesus.
SOS – You are not Alone! God is with you and for you! Say his name -Jesus-and he will come running to you!
Praying for our beautiful country and all our beautiful human souls! God hears all our cries, I love the song below because the song is stating God see you, you arenot forgotten, never hopeless….Take a moment and listen God hears you!!🙏🏻❤️
You are not hidden There’s never been a moment You were forgotten You are not hopeless Though you have been broken Your innocence stolen
I hear you whisper underneath your breath I hear your SOS, your SOS
I will send out an army to find you In the middle of the darkest night It’s true, I will rescue you
There is no distance That cannot be covered Over and over You’re not defenseless I’ll be your shelter I’ll be your armor
I hear you whisper underneath your breath I hear your SOS, your SOS
I will send out an army to find you In the middle of the darkest night It’s true, I will rescue you I will never stop marching to reach you In the middle of the hardest fight It’s true, I will rescue you
I will send out an army to find you In the middle of the darkest night It’s true, I will rescue you I will never stop marching to reach you In the middle of the hardest fight It’s true, I will rescue you
I took a recent break from internet and most forms of communications this last week, specifically the news because I cannot handle the negative reports or watch what our country is falling prey too. This is not a war of politics, of the races, he said, she said, the enemy is destroying our nation through words, words of offense, words that when spoken hurt to your very soul, brother wounding brother, tearing apart friendships, devouring family relationships, splitting families apart, destroying marriages, taking your eyes off the real problem, which is simply your word, and how you will speak.Did you not know your words have the power of life and death?
I have read stories written with words about injustice, justice, lack of justice and no justice. I have seen two races throw and sling mud back and forth, stirring up the pot of civil unrest. I have seen ignorance run amok, spilling out over this nation, as a slow poisonous gas, that is slowly leaking, toxic fumes, engulfing races, and igniting flames of hatred, discord, animosity, disrespect intertwining webs of deceit, revenge and murder. These stories have made me mad to the point I am shaking in my shoes. The worst part is the men, women and children who lost their lives. I pray for their families, my heart breaks.
When will this nation learn that words are a very powerful and formidable weapon, which causes life or death? Words are power, to be used, to teach, edify, inspire, buoy up, cheer, comfort, console, embolden, hearten, reassure, please encourage a person to use their words for good, to be a building block of prosperity. When we allow words to deface, demoralize, devalue, to cause distrust, to breed hatred, to bring contempt, to pit brother against brother, and I am talking in the biblical sense, we as a nation are allowing words to destroy our children, our marriages, our families, all of our relationships, our very nation. Please stop words of destruction!
Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.”Dec 15, 2014 Please read the article in its entirety below.
A very wise man once told me, if you do not want something known, do not speak it, or write it, for you surely will be exposed. This man told me to always be careful with my words. I took this to heart, I am very careful with my words, I want my words to edify, to teach, to encourage and be uplifting. I want my words to be spoken in truth, if I have a discord with someone, I will try my best to find a way to state my case, hopefully fix it and move on. I do not use, it as an opportunity to ambush, spread lies, breed contempt, or start a war. Hatred breed’s hatred and that is what the enemy wants. The enemy wants us to hate one another!
God’s words in the bible are powerful, when spoken, those words come alive, for the word of God are “Life.” God ‘s word does not change, for it is the same today, as it was yesterday and will be tomorrow.
Words have power to build, encourage, edify, and build greatness into a person, but words also have the ability to kill, steal and destroy a person. That old saying about sticks and stones will break your bones, but words will never hurt you, is a lie, straight from hell.
What does the Bible say about the power of words?
Proverbs 15: 1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but hard words stir up anger.” Proverbs 15:4 “Gentle words bring life and health; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” … Proverbs 18:4 “A person’s words can be life-giving water; words of true wisdom are as refreshing as a bubbling brook.”Apr 6, 2015
What did Jesus say about words?
Proverbs 15:4 “Gentle words bring life and health; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” Proverbs 16:24 “Kind words are like honey–sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.” Proverbs 18:4 “A person’s words can be life-giving water; words of true wisdom are as refreshing as a bubbling brook.”Apr 6, 201
You see, you have a choice; it has to start with you. You can use words for the good of this nation and mankind or you can continue to use words to destroy.
How will you stand with the powerful words that flow from your mouth, will you speak empathy, words of compassion, words of character and integrity, words that lead to conversations, words that lead to reconciliation or will words flow from your mouth that show hate, cruelty, threats, will your words cause violence, will your words destroy families, for hate begets hate, until finally our people lay dead, children, mothers, fathers sisters, brothers and families, will your words cause their death, words can be an evil that destroys from within? Or words can be the very living water your soul needs to change!
I pray you use your powerful words for Good of all of Humanity! The choice is simply yours!
Warning – Graphic Content- This is my story. The current headlines are scary and frighten me to such a point , I have to shut it all down. I feel helpless. Its all out of my control. Ninety-nine percent of what I view, I don’t believe, as it rallies against common sense and logical thinking. The newscasters seem to be exaggerating story lines. I tried following podcasts from all groups to learn more about current events.
I searched myself. my thoughts, feelings and prayed. After praying I feel led to share my own personnel story now, forty years later. I can only share my story and hope it helps one person. It is time. We all are given a choice.
For those who don’t know, I am almost six feet tall, very pale, red-haired, southern woman with freckles. I have experienced prejudice reactions from other groups that resulted in bullying early on in school, based on the color of my skin, gender, weight, hair color, accent, freckles, height, breasts, hips, thighs, sound of my voice, smell of my hair. These bullying attacks came from all sides. School became a nightmare for me.
The nightmare exploded in high school, I rode a bus to and from school every day over an hour each way, on a particular day, a group of five students who had harassed me all year with fear tactics through verbal threats, chanting, name calling, mocking, facial expressions and blocking passage to exist the bus, decided to take their fun one step further.
It was the second last week of school for the year and summer vacation was ahead! There were only eight on the bus as we headed down the highway with our bus-driver (who was a student) and seven seated students. My sister and I were sitting midway on bus reading, when the other five students snuck up behind us and pulled my sister and I up out of our seats from behind! We were roughly held against our will by two girls and the boys began to rub all over our blouses feeling our breasts and despite our screams the bus driver ignored what was taking place. He kept driving, laughing and looking up in the mirror. When one of the boys tried to reach between my legs, I broke loose, reached over the seat, grabbing my big history book and fought back by whacking him up side the head into the window. I had no choice but to fight, as we were being assaulted. The bus driver still did nothing to help. Everything was a blur, thereafter as I fought to survive and help my sister. Time seemed to disappear, when would it end? Suddenly the bus came to a hard stop, all of us flung apart, we were ordered to get off, by the bus driver! My mother hearing the bus driver, looked up from her lawn seat in the yard and as I stumbled across the front of the bus, I saw “Rage” fly into my mother when she saw her children, both of us beat to a pulp. My mom flew past us onto that bus and was , surprise, blocked and manhandled by our bus driver, so my mother couldn’t get to the five who had beat us, I heard her through her screams, but couldn’t make out what she said as my ears were ringing, the last thing I witnessed was my mom slapping the bus driver(over 18) in the face and him pushing my mom backward off the bus. The bus drove off, and my mother stood up on the other side of the road, she went running after the bus or so I thought and then I realized she was using neighbors phone to call for help!
My mom came back and took us in, she asked all the hard questions no mother should ever have to ask their children. I vaguely remember a local doc coming to our home, saying my right jaw was fractured but would heal in time, right side of face swollen beyond recognition, barely able to see out my eye, bruises everywhere would also take time . My sister was in shock with many bruises. Why would our fellow students do this to us, why became our biggest question! Mom got us in shower and helped us to bed.It took several weeks for myself and my sister to heal, sadly the hidden scars stayed with me developing into anxiety. The “Why” remained unanswered.
That day I could have chosen to hate two races of men or hate men in general……or have it out for every girl who looked like the ones that helped the boys attack us. These six individuals do not define an entire races or cultures. Their criminal actions define a very bad event that took place, that was a crime against me and my sister. I chose not to hate, but to see them at their heart level. They are each responsible for their own actions, as well as the bus driver for his lack of action. One male attacker came forward and sincerely apologized to me and my sister. During the last week of school , he was attacked in the school lunch room and beat up side the head with a lead pipe by the others (his own friends) who had assaulted us. There was never any resolution. No charges.
I learned as an adult I was sexually assaulted having never heard that word in my childhood which traumatized and affected me for years.
I am confident the event caused my anxiety that I live with everyday, as I have a deep fear of being trapped , not able to escape. It also caused me to have to be in control of myself and my surroundings.
Now forty years later, I see hate running everywhere, assumptions being made, great division and many distractions.
This is the age of disillusionment and distraction! In order to find truth you will need to disconnect , find a quiet spot, turn everything off, reflect and search your own heart! Ask yourself , why you believe what you do, are the beliefs accurate or wrong?My heart says the killings have to stop! Innocent lives; babies , children and our love ones are dying! I’m crying for humanity, I’ve never seen so much pain!
Division is a tactic of old, it is the enemy trying to destroy us all ! I could have chosen to hate, discriminate or seek revenge! Instead I chose to forgive, for without forgiveness there is no reconciliation or unity.
Love covers a multitude of sin. I chose “Love”, for God first loved us! God commands us to love him with our all! Gods second greatest commandment is for us to Love one another! Sadly,there is not much of that second love going around.
“Jesus gave him a clear answer: the greatest among many things that man could do is to love. To love God wholly and totally (with one’s heart soul, and mind) and to love one’s neighbor are the greatest commandments of all. … Because God is love and that is why we are able to ❤️”
What is your choice? LOVE or HATE?
I think this song says it all, heal us, start with me!
Twenty years ago I asked my daughter “Why do you need a pet? My daughter was manipulating on every level to get a dog for her upcoming birthday. I grew up with pets and actually disliked most animals due to allergies, fleas , ticks, dog hair and accidents. I wasn’t attached to our pets growing up as they were always my mothers pets. It made me angry when I was a child, as I felt it was just one more distraction in our home, with fighting four other kids for mom’s attention. I didn’t want the responsibility!
All week long the pleas grew longer and louder and I against my better judgement relented and agreed to go to the Flea Market at the state fairgrounds and have a look, but no promises.
Arriving at the flea-market and parking was a pain in the derriere, people were ruthless and upon existing the car the heat hit me like Hades and both of us being redheads we immediately turned bright red and looked for shade. The heat was unbearable. Pulling out water bottles we re-hydrated and planned our course of where to look and get out looking as crowds and I didn’t do well together.
Lucky for us the pets were in the shaded area for potential owners to view and play with, in hopes of a sell. The puppy breeders came from three and four states away. Not to mention the puppies cost an arm and a leg. My daughter and I looked at many breeds, lucky for me I couldn’t afford any of them. My disappointed daughter and I left to get lunch, on way home, at the local favorite “Farmers Market” resturante , shortly thereafter, as I ate BBQ chicken, collards, corn on cob, my daughter sadly played in her food . My beautiful girl wanted a puppy, I told her “Come on , lets go” we drove back to fairgrounds. We raced to the shaded area , there was one breeder left, the heat had got many to leave early and as we walked up we heard foul angry words spoken sharply at the puppy as he was shoved in a cage being called worthless runt, gonna put you down, dont no one want a brown eyed dog.
I instantly cleared my throat and spoke up, “Sir, I will take that worthless dog, how much? The sharp reply was $500, I quickly calculated and knew I didn’t have enough in my checking account. I started bartering with the breeder and got him down to $200, convinced him I was saving him money by taking dog off his hands.
The breeder literally shoved the dog at me before the ink on my worthless check was dry! We ran to the car and gave the dehydrated puppy water rinsing him off, as he was panting from the heat. Both my daughter and I fell in love in an instant as the puppy gazed in our eyes.We both called out the name Dakota. I just wasn’t sure what kind of dog he was, with his big paws. The veterinarian would educate me in a few weeks. Surprise, Surprise……………..Join me for part two, to continue reading Dakota’s Story.
Why do I write a blog? Writing is a way to express myself, when no one is listening to my words. A freedom that has literally saved me from myself. The last two years of writing was to encourage , pray for others and to share a love of cooking with do it yourself projects. At the beginning of my blog I grew frustrated, due to low followers, likes and comments. I wanted my blog to be successful. Numbers matter! Right? Jealousy slowly set in of other bloggers and their blog success, my blog just lagged behind leaving me wondering what I was doing wrong. Blogging was great for me, it is kind of like self-therapy, it helps me to go through and process things I am trying to understand about life. On hindsight, I’ve learned my voice has power, my voice can roar, my voice can be very broken and my voice can tell many stories in years to come. Yet my voice can’t help me get over my fear of really writing and being rejected. I consider myself a “Truth” writer, I put my voice in a box and followed what I thought the rules were so as not to offend or cross boundaries. I haven’t written much lately. I’m reflecting looking back in order to go forward. I came to the serious conclusion that I would rather draw in one reader with my words. One million followers would be awesome, yet that one person I am trying to reach is awesome too and priceless. My goal going forward is to reach one person that needs an encouraging word, uplifting, a good recipe to change things up or a creative project. Welcome to my Blog!!
God was listening and heard Desiree prayer, and God dispatched for one of his best angels and commanded “Because Desiree loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue her; I will protect her, for she acknowledges my name, she called me and I will send help; I will be with her in trouble, I will deliver her and honor her. “Sadly, Desiree didnot know God had sent help, she was hanging on by a thread of faith, she prayed and it remained silent.
The only thing Desiree could do to fight the depression was to physically work in the yard. Thus far it had taken a week to relocate her moms favorite bird bath and the rock border that surrounded the bird bath. Desiree knew moving it would be no easy feat, yet necessary as it was sinking slowly into the mud due to the heavy rains. Desiree’s depression was like the bird bath, she was sinking, and felt unutterably stuck. Desiree remembered a scripture and spoke it out loud, declaring “I can do all things through Christ who strengthen me.” The scripture when spoken out loud flowed with life like rivers of living water, crystal clear, breathing and moving through the atmosphere. The angel clapped in glee and saw a glorious beautiful day, the deepest of blue skies, warm sun shining with a soft breeze that carefully lifted Desiree hair off her face cooling her down from the heat!
The angel circled around her protectively watching over her, lest she dash her foot on a stone. If only her surroundings could magically lift the heavy weight of sadness she carried, like a two ton chain, wrapped around her shoulders from life’s hardships. The angel had been ministering to Desiree nonstop, depression had been sent as an attack of the fallen one. God had commanded the angel to protect Desiree in all her ways. God had sent the angel to deliver Desiree from the depression and intended what had been meant for harm to turn it to good as it was a part of his plan to prosper her and give her hope. The thread of Faith Desiree held onto had been knotted on the end by the Angel.
Desiree began the task of relocating her mom’s bird bath, by first pulling up the boulder rocks that were partially buried weighing from 5 to 20 pounds each! Each rock felt cemented down, heavy and sucked down into the mud, where the rocks had been located for over ten years around the base of the birdbath. Each rock she pulled up took strength, muster and determination. Desiree spoke over the stumbling rocks as she pulled each one out saying , anger be gone, sadness be gone, depression be gone, betrayal be gone, rejection be gone, lies be gone, spiritual attacks be gone, poverty be gone, heartache be gone working the rocks out of the miry clay dirt , then several days later with many broken ragged fingernails, Desiree pulled up the last rock and said attacks of the mind be gone. Desiree felt an instant peace. The angel circled rejoicing as Desiree spoke life into her circumstances. Desiree then began praying on the full armor of God, and she grew stronger. The hard work actually felt good! Then Desiree discovered the root of her problems as she pulled up the last rock, underneath laid a massive root which she pulled and it would not give. The root was strong and had been planted many years ago when she was but a small wee child. The root was harsh words spoken to her by the enemy, through her earth father, meant to destroy her, yet but for God!
Desiree understood now, her father wasn’t her enemy, the root of all evil (satan) was her enemy. Desiree got her gardening tools and she began attacking that root with all her strenght and called on God asking for help saying she was weak and laid it at his feet, letting go and drawing in strenght sent by the Holy Spirit, digging up the root, the root was her enemy, Desiree dug and cut at the root for over eight hours, with root spanning twenty feet from the bird bath, and finally she came to the end of the root and ripped it out proclaiming in Jesus name ?I am delivered and healed.” The angels heard her declaration and an angel hit a cymbal declaring a “I Got The Victory” heard all throughout heaven!
Desiree studied the bird bath which was leaning like the “Tower of Pisa” in Italy, half the pedestal was buried in the mud and the tulip basin was only a foot from the ground. Desiree decided to flip over the top water basin let all the dirty water,sludge and mud fall to the ground completely being emptied out, knowing the water basin would bear the weight of the fall. Desiree carefully lifted the tulip basin and flipped it over which allowed all the water and mud to run out, then she softly let it hit the ground. Suddenly time stood still and Desiree watched in amazement as all the filth came out of the water basin and without warning all earthly noise stopped and she heard her master and saviors voice speak to her causing her to fall to her knees, Saying ” Desiree, I allowed satan to shift you, but I prayed for you that your faith will not fail you, when you have turned back strengthen others!” Desiree weeped, in joy, her heavenly fathers voice, precious in every way , had finally arrived. God kept his promise and didn’t forsake her, God prayed for her, he had heard her prayers. At that moment Desiree rested in the shadow of the almighty as his wings wrapped around her and gave her his rest!
Spiritually Desiree blossomed into a warrior as she strategically studied how to rebuild the bird bath! Desiree spoke out loud declaring “And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” Desiree was filled with Holy Spirit and upon her declaration her words flowed like rivers of living water circling around her spiritually, physically , mentally and emotionally in the earthly realm and the heavenly realm. Desiree dug out the pedestal base of the bird bath, rolled it on its side to sit by the tulip basin. Then she began moving rocks to the new spot for the bird bath, hoping the harder surface would prevent it sinking, placing the bird bath pedestal where it wouldn’t sink in mud.
Lord behold when Desiree turned around to pick up the tulip part the water bath basin she discovered it weighed over 150 lbs. Desiree could not lift it alone. Desiree liked completing her projects once started but had to come to a halt take a break.
Three days Desiree studied the tulip basin , just as she was rebuilding the bird bath, spiritually she was rebuilding her relationship and walk with God! As night fell on the third evening Desiree studied the bird bath from the front screen door, whispering to God, help me, and suddenly she witnessed a digital line run on ground, go up the pedestal, and lean it on the biggest rock, then watched as the water basin was rolled in front, Desiree jumped for joy and ran out the door, excited beyond measure!
Desiree didn’t need her strength to lift the heavy water basin, she just needed faith! Desiree rolled the pedestal in front of the biggest rock, leaning it on the rock, then she rolled, the water basin in front , then slowly pushed upward connecting both pieces with hardly any effort. The bird bath was upright and the two pieces clicked into one. Then Desiree sat the Angel statue into the water basin standing tall and glorious, not realizing the guardian angel God had sent her was watching! Desiree glorified God giving him all the Glory, she was amazed that while rolling the pedestal she realized something incredible!
Psalm 61:1-3 Hear my cry, O God, attend to my prayer.
2 From the end of the earth I will cry to You; when my heart faints, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. 3 For You have been a refuge for me, and a strong tower from the enemy.
Desiree could not lift that heavy tulip basin for the bird bath it weighed so much but when she leaned it against “The Rock ” The Rock is Jesus Christ the Rock of salvation. What Desiree couldn’t do it in her own strength, but when leaned it over to the Rock what happened?The Rock lifted up so what she couldn’t do in her own strength, Jesus can do in his strength, for he is the Rock! That’s two stories in one and it had Desiree jumping! Jesus would restore Desiree!
God was spiritually showing her to lean on the “Rock.” Jesus is the Rock! The rolling of the tulip water basin was a reminder that after three days Jesus rose and and only Jesus could move the stone, and an angel was left to meet the women who came to attend to the Lord. Jesus is the resurrection and life!
Desiree, wrote her story and shared it on a blog and millions read the story of her faith, trusting God. Seeds of Hope were planted, and it was like a mighty river flowed from the bird bath spiritually splitting into many rivers going all over the earth. The message was clear!
Trust God, Lean on God, Jesus is the Rock, God will not forsake us, What man cannot do , God is able, God hears our prayers, God Listens, God Speaks, and God Guides us!
The angel often meets Desiree at the Bird Bath, with the angel statue, gazing as she quietly prays, listening and waiting on the Lord! Jesus is the Rock and daily Desiree casts her burdens upon the Lord, trusting God to work out all her problems. Desiree’s angel captures her prayers and swiftly carries them to heaven!
What satan had meant for bad, God turned around and used it for good! The Rock Can Bare the Weight!
Today, I have to push myself to get out of bed. I was plagued with three different nightmares trying to sleep between 4:30 am and 9am when I awoke the first time, then 10am. Finally at noon I sat up, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed, all I had to do was put my feet on floor. It was areal struggle. Mom was up till 4:30 am, she was finally sleeping, after her sun downing had kept us awake. Then all the stuff with the quarantine is getting to me. Are you feeling discourage like me? Together as a Nation we are now in 40 days of Quarantine! Yet as an individual, I’m feeling more like at 240 days quarantine , only leaving my house three times since September. My quarantine began when my vehicle was vandalized, determined a total loss. Geico didn’t cover. Second because in Jan. I was sick with Pneumonia, took till April to recover, I’m blessed to be alive and then Covid 19 happens, and the goverment mandates we all stay home.
The difference between 40 days and 240 days is the isolation. I’m tired of streaming shows, I’m running out of things to keep me and mom busy, my heart and soul ache for my love ones who I miss dearly, I will not be with my daughter on her birthday. I miss all the excitement and personalities of my grandchildren. I crave hugs, laughter and a good family gathering. I have also been caregiving my mom, she is my best friend and I am glad we have each other in this season, she is grieving loss of her soulmate/ best friend of 57 years. I can’t imagine her pain, it is fast approaching the anniversary of my Dad’s passing. I miss gathering at my church, worshiping God.
I’m not having a pity party, I like you am living through a part of history that is frightening. Things get to you, the news is to scary to watch, your crying for all those who got sick, praying it passes by your family. Praying God have mercy on us all, I’m pleading blood of Jesus, not just for me , myself and my family , I’m crying out for the world. Our prayers need to be bold, courageous, crying out to God as we walk through this season in faith.
Today , I’m having hard time getting out of bed, it’s not my strength that propels me to sit up, for I am weak, tired, yet God says when I am weak his strength sustains me, the Holy Spirit encourages me, and as my feet hit the floor, and I go to my knees, the Lion of Judah gives me the power to roar out prayers, we all need to be roaring our prayers! God is always listening for his children’s cry’s.
Today let your feet hit the floor and roar ……God is listening and God will fight for us! Cry out, repent, get on your knees. Today the best thing I did was put my feet on the floor, God did the rest, Glory Hallelujah!
Today, I started out with good intentions. The chore list was outlined first, clean up the utility room, clean cat boxes, take out trash, second vacuum and sweep, third touch up kitchen. Only problem was nothing went according to my plan. Our overweight black lab, got territorial and when I stood in utility room, I found he left a wonderful present, he pooped in our cat boxes and then peed up and down the outside of the cat boxes mixing his pee in cat litter he had dumped out on the floor. An hour later after I cleaned up his mess, I proceed to mom’s bedroom, to find to my horror all my mom’s nice comforters are on the floor, dirty, with hairballs, cat throw up, covered in black lab hair with the big black lab rolling all over the comforters. I shew the dog away, pick up the comforters and head to laundry room, to throw in wash. I come back to mom bedroom and step in wet dog saliva slipping trying to stay upright.
While I’m getting that cleaned up, my mom thinks the cats are underfeed and opened five cans of cat food dished out on ten saucers, placed all over house. Mom then opens back door letting all pets outside, only problem is the cats are not suppose to go out, they are house cats. Thirty minutes in back yard, on a search mission, catching cats.
Usually, when I’m trying to do chores, mom gets more active, she is 77 and likes to help, but even when I give her small chores, I usually have moments like with the cat food. Mom thinks she has done these habits all her life.
Due to Hashimotos, I’m fatigued and after all the above I’m exhausted. Yet, I carry onward, I’m not a quitter, I proceed to clean kitchen. Today is trash day, so I collect all the trash, to go outside, and as I pull kitchen bag out the bag busts spewing garbage everywhere, as Im standing there looking in horror at the mess, our two cats race through kitchen and that big black lab clocks my left knee out from under me and I go down into all the trash screaming in pain while words and noises spew forth out my mouth that I despise. My language was worse than my drill Sargent dad with new recruits. 😭
I just sat on that garbage strewn floor and emotionally lost it. I truly grieved over the loss of my father who death anniversary is May 1, 2020. Then I proceeded to cry harder, hyperventilate and get my butt kicked by a bad anxiety attack sinking into a good pity party, over how I’m mostly obsolete to my siblings , I really could use their help. I don’t get breaks weeks on end, they think I get a break everyday, they truly seem to have no understanding what it is to be our moms caregiver, managing prescriptions, breathing machines, medical emergencies, doctor calls, being on call 24/7, sleep deprivation, can’t work due to my medical issues, no income, waiting on Disability hearing, my vehicle vandalized, no transportation, can’t get to my doctors, no way to provide my financial needs, and as I sat on that messy floor, I just hung my head in shame. While it is complex caring for my mom , I just feel I lack a good family support team to help out. I’m here because I love my mom, I enjoy being with her making memories, I just feel very alone without an adequate support team. I am mother’s caregiver, cook, housekeeper first, then her daughter second.
When you’re caring for a loved one, there’s nothing you won’t do (or sacrifice) to give them as much comfort and peace of mind as you can possibly provide. Often, that means you’ll skip your social obligations, wreck your diet, suffer sleep deprivation, and even risk your career, all to help a loved one through the most difficult time of their life.
Now. I had to figure out how to get up off the floor, I shamelessly slid across the floor and rolled onto the couch , not caring about garbage, I will clean it later. I’m fortunate and grateful for my time with mom. On days like this, I simply go to God and ask forgiveness, its not about me, I’m blessed above measure to have this time with my mom, I have learned so much from her, Oh how I thank God for my momma!
I WANTED TO BE A MOM. I wanted to stay home with these precious kids. I quit my job, surrendered my identity—the young, just-out-of-business-school-turned-professional. I believed my choice was narrow—just one or the other: Be a mom or work. (Are these my only choices, God?) I didn’t want to miss puddle-jumping, block-building, hand-holding, park-playing days like this one. I am grateful to have had the opportunity to make that decision. I am. I just didn’t know I would struggle so much. I didn’t know this would be so hard.
I thought I would feel different, God. I thought I would do this better—that I would be more organized and wouldn’t feel so depleted all the time. I said I wanted to stay home with my babies, and I know it is so amazing that I can. But here is what is hard to admit, even to you: I don’t like it as much as I thought I would. I’m afraid I’m not good at it. I’m even less confident now that we have two.
I’m going to mess them up, God. I know I am. I lose my temper, I raise my voice. And when I am not yelling out loud, I feel like I am screaming inside. I know that’s an exaggeration. That sounds so melodramatic, “screaming inside.” But no other words feel right.
Why do I feel so trapped, so stuck? I don’t know who I am, or what I love to do, or what it is that might be fun for me anymore. I should feel parenting is so fun, so completely fulfilling. I’m sorry that, right now, I don’t, and it isn’t. I’m sorry for who I am. I’m sorry I am so far from you and don’t know how to find my way back.
Can you help me find my way back?
DAUGHTER, YOU CAN BE ANGRY. I can take it. You can be sad. I can take that too. Keep running to me when you are sad and overwhelmed, and I will give you what you need to get through a day. You think that you are camouflaged, but I see all.
You can do this, you know. You can mother him and love him, and I will help you find your way. You ask me what you love? Who you are?
Let me tell you what I see: I see you. I see you in the early mornings when the baby is crying and you rise. I see you bend to scoop him up out of his crib, hear how you sing to him. I watch how you stumble, so tired, back to a rumpled bed.
May I sing to you now? May I sing to you, my daughter who is found?
Lift up your head, my darling. Lift up your head, and see me looking at you. I have made you with beauty. I have made you with strength. I have made you with tenderness, a soft heart for me that will sustain you. I sustain you. Keep your heart soft, and I will sustain you. Keep yourself vulnerable, and I will lift you. Keep yourself close to me, and I will show you, step by step, what it is you love, what it is in you I see.
There’s a lot coming, dear one. You are both a light that shines and a warrior in my name. How this looks—your life in me—will unfold as you trust me. In you, I keep creating, dear one. I love being with you as we partner in your work, bringing what is to come.
Yes, I see you. And I want you to begin this day again, knowing I see you, knowing I know you. I dance over you. My gladness overflows.
You are my dear heart, my bright flower. I father you and I mother you. I care for you, and you rise again, letting me lead, letting me take charge, letting me be the door you walk through each day when you are lost and you are wondering how, again, you can face another day.
You don’t need to face another day alone. You can greet each day with me. You can rise with me, stay with me, listen for me. In the creak of the high chair at lunchtime. In the jingling of toys as Jonathan and Lucas laugh and cry and play. In the hush or whimpers of the night.
My strength is enough for you. My presence is with you. My Spirit is in you.
I sustain you, never leave you. There is good coming.
There is good right here.
Father, you are unashamed of me—your love is wild and perfect. I love how you have made me. I love how I don’t have to hide from you, no matter what I am feeling. You give me a voice to call out to you, and you answer. You reveal to me yourself, showing how you are present with me, how you care for me, how you hold me and never let me go. I have what it takes to love those you’ve given me to love. I have what it takes to get through this day, holding your hand. Help me to do all these things, knowing I stay with you. In your name, Jesus, Amen.
I’m just sitting here, drinking coffee, thinking about you and just hoped you took time to enjoy this beautiful glorious day outside our homes! Look at what that the Lord has given us! Such Glory on earth!
Use your day wisely, be Kind and share the Love of Jesus with everyone you come in contact with today, even the ones that make it hard to do so as they need Jesus just like all of us!
I watched a red headed wood pecker, or what looked like one in my front yard, squirrels playing, little swarms of bugs that looked like dust fairies floating in patterns and a Beautiful Blue Bird came by to sing! Way too fast for my camera phone, yet I got pics of all spring plants popping up below.
In The Beginning Man Tried Ascending To Heaven via The Tower Of Babel. Now He Tries To Elevate His Existence Using Hallucinogenic Drugs. And, Since The 20th Century, He Continually Voyages Into Outer Space Using Spacecrafts. Prayer Thru Christ Is The Only Way To Reach Heaven.
Atunci când burniţa descurajării mă îngrozeşte, fă ca viaţa mea spirituală să înflorească.. fă să dispară ceaţa groasă care îmi învăluie fiinţa întreagă ! Fii Tu Soarele neprihănirii care să strălucească !